When Peter saw him, he said to Jesus, “What about this man?” If it is my will that he remain until I come, what is that to you? You follow me!”  (John 21:21-22 ESV).

When I pray in the morning, I picture myself in the throne room. Everything is white and God is a brilliant glow of gold beaming from his throne. Jesus is silent to his right. I enter with an earthly fear that quickly turns into an indescribable awe. I am calm and at peace here.

One morning I noticed a wall on my left side. I was kneeling next to it. I questioned why there is a wall in the throne room and what is on the other side? I quickly shifted my focus back to God and began my morning scripture reading. On this day I was finishing the gospel of John.

This is the section that Jesus asks Peter, “Do you love me?” three separate times. Each time Peter answers, “You know I do,” and Jesus follows with a command. At the end of this conversation, Jesus reveals how Peter will glorify God in his death by crucifixion. This he said to show by what kind of death he was to glorify God.” And after saying this he said to him, “Follow Me.” (John 21:19 ESV).

Jesus then walks away and Peter follows, noticing John is also following him. When Peter saw him, he said to Jesus, “What about this man?” If it is my will that he remain until I come, what is that to you? You follow me!”  (John 21:21-22 ESV).

Earlier this week I found myself judging someone for what their Christian walk seemed to me. God gently reminded me that he is the judge, not me, so I apologized to this person. I was also reminded of the multiple times I compare myself to others. Sometimes leaving me to feel not good enough and other times feeling better than. This is also judging not only myself, but others through distorted standards. Again, it is not my job to judge.

Suddenly scripture and my world collided! How? With a wall, in the throne room. The wall is there to remind me like Peter; it is none of my business. It does not matter who else is in the throne room, or how they worship. The wall is not there to keep me from anyone else, but to keep me focused on my reason for being there, to worship God.

Like Peter I can be quick to jump out of the boat and run toward Jesus, but I also seek validation through comparison. When I am truly following Christ, I have all the validation I need. I am no longer worried about who or what is on the other side of the wall, are you?

Blessings,

Kathryn